I was approached by a woman living down the street from a job site. A woman I had seen walking with her children but I had had no interaction with other than to say hello.
This woman came to my home under the pretense of learning about nature. This woman was married at the time and she propositioned me with helping to put the “spark” back into her unhappy marriage.
I informed her that I would not touch another’s man’s wife. She said her husband was aware of what she was doing. I told her that I needed to look him in the eye and hear him confirm. Her husband met me at a local bar a few days later and told me the same. I had my fears and concerns about becoming involved in such a sordid business. I was worried about my reputation, their little girls.
They both asked for discretion and secrecy, claiming they did not want such an “unconventional” arrangement to stigmatize the children or the husband’s career. We live in a small town and these people are Mennonite. I am not from that background and have no ties to their subculture. In other words a perfect sucker!
I will admit that I let my judgment be clouded by loneliness and lust. I succumbed to my baser instincts. I became this woman’s “back door man.”
Within a month or so she declared her love for me. By three months, she had left her husband “for me.” She said she had been waiting her whole life for a man like me. “We were soulmates.” The universe had finally brought us together.
I was such a damn fool!
She was so good to me, so sweet, so kind. I had never had a woman treat me so well and seem to understand me. Like I said, I was a damn fool.
I fell for her! Head over heels.
I developed a friendship and love for her girls. We shared Christmas together. Easter at her father’s. I met siblings. She told me what a good influence I was in her and her daughter’s lives.
I did feel guilt towards her husband, but I was feeling such joy that I didn’t analyze what she had said and done to him.
We had a few disagreements.
They were strange…puzzling.
She made some remarks, slips of the tongue. Foolishly, I did not let any of the red flags register.
She came to me one day upset. She was pregnant.
I was not surprised She was hypersexual and refused birth control other than the rhythm method.
She had stated earlier in the “relationship” that she wanted to have my child. She had even said that she wished that I was her daughters’ real father.
I told her that I was with her and I would always stand with her whatever her decision.
I took her to the clinic five days later where we were shown a picture of a six-week-old baby.
Twenty-four hours later she would not acknowledge my existence.
She claims that I am an abusive monster and went no contact.
I was never allowed to say goodbye to her girls. I was never allowed any honest reason or justification.
It turns out she wasn’t sure who the father of that baby she aborted was!
I admit that this entire nightmare has caused me to become unstable and hostile but I am only human.
I was a good man before I allowed this evil into my life.
Now my reputation is trashed and I am an abusive man. This has been a condensed version of events.
This nightmare is so much worse than I am capable of putting into words! Thank you for allowing me an opportunity to express my pain. I have no resources.
I have been shunned and declared a damaged and bad man. I swear on my mother’s grave and in all that is sacred to me that I have fabricated none of my story.
I will give my life in defense of my truth!
I am 45 year’s old and a self-employed carpenter. I am passionate about nature and natural history. I believe in the “Golden Rule.” I have tried to live my life by that principle. I do have my weaknesses. I will admit to them and I try not to allow them to negatively affect others. I have strong beliefs about morality, equality, and justice. I try to temper these ideals with compassion and understanding. If I believe that an injustice has been committed to myself, to another, to the earth, I am not afraid to stand and fight. I try to choose my battles wisely. I don’t know how to fight this battle wisely. The damage that this past “relationship” has left me with has broken me. I don’t know how to move forward. I am not the man I used to be. I can’t stand what I have become. Allowing this “force” into my life is the greatest mistake I have ever made. I was a fool. I didn’t know manipulation, cruelty, and deceit until I allowed this woman into my life.