Living Through and Recovering From a Relationship with a Narcissist

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I am a narcissistic abuse survivor.

I never saw it coming. Before I ever got into the relationship that put me in this situation, I’d had a Ph.D. in Sociology and spent my academic career studying theories for why people engage in criminal and deviant behavior, unequal gender dynamics, and sexual assault. How had I ended up here?

After the relationship ended, I knew something profound had just happened to me. I couldn’t even explain it, nor could I understand why my own identity and behavior had changed in ways I didn’t understand. I started this blog as a way to process what happened using both my personal experience and educational background.

Over time, the blog has grown into so much more. I am passionate about empowering other survivors to leave their abusive relationships and about promoting awareness of this hidden form of abuse.  

As I recover from the relationship, I continue to write about narcissistic abuse from a graphic, personal perspective and tie it to larger sociological and social psychological concepts.  I want to drive home why this is not just an individual problem–it’s a societal problem.

Also, narcissistic abuse has features and a pattern that can be observed in other familiar phenomena in the larger society. I believe making that connection may help survivors to receive more support. Read more about the mission of the website here

My work has been published at PsychCentral, Your Tango, Mindcology, and Thought Catalog. I am currently a biweekly blogger at on “Verbal Abuse in Relationships.” I have also written a toolkit for survivors called, “Taking Your Life Back After a Relationship with a Narcissist,” which is available on the website for free. 

Thank you for visiting my website.

-Kristen Milstead