Comments on: What a Narcissist Does at the End of a Relationship

By: Mwlissa

Mwlissa — Tue, 04 Apr 2023 00:30:48 +0000

My name is Melissa
I was married 16 years almost 17 to narcissist I knew almost from the beginning it was a mistake we dated for four months or married at six. I left him out of my love, and my safety for him to seek peace and to learn to love myself I am still the injured one, as he has met him a new love, and yes, alert and found out this information. Every day is a struggle to try to find my way back. I try to find my own peace my love it’s been since 2021 and I still have had nobody interested. I wonder myself is it that I may be the Narcissis, or that it shows on my face that I am not healed from this dreadful 16 year battle . I hope and pray there’s a light at the end of the rainbow and that somehow I can let myself in other. Did they sing quick? The time seem short I hope and pray someday I will meet another and not go through the same pain and learn to love again.

By: Dorothy

Dorothy — Sun, 02 Apr 2023 12:12:41 +0000

We were together for 50 yrs. He retired and the monster came out. He beat me up after being married 2 yrs. we already had our 1st child. We had 4 all together. Verbal abuse happened all the time. I most of hurted so bad, I blocked it all in the back of my memory. After he retired he walked out . I went to some concealing and started to remembered all the painful things he had done. 3 out of our 4 adult kids took his side.its been 3 yrs. That I haven’t seen my grandkids. His games continue. This is where he knows how bad he’s hurting me. The nightmare doesn’t end. I’m going to be 70. Will it ever end?

By: Kristen Milstead

Kristen Milstead — Sun, 08 Nov 2020 19:46:43 +0000

In reply to William. Hi William -- I'm so sorry to hear this. The coldness they can show are devastating. You are not alone. Please keep reading and reach out to others who have been through something similar. Wishing you peace. -Kristen

By: William

William — Fri, 06 Nov 2020 21:07:39 +0000

In reply to Unknown soldier.

My partner left me suddenly a daylight flit leaving 2 of 4 kittens .
Then wanted other 2
Went from loving psrtnsr to stranger in a soace of 2 weeks

By: Unknown soldier

Unknown soldier — Fri, 17 Apr 2020 12:13:35 +0000

I often wondered this myself & did go back for a 2nd round thinking there might be a way to help/change his narcissist ways but it didn’t work.
There was the odd time when he showed a hint of remorse for being so cruel but I started to see a pattern once my head took over from my heart.
This article set off a ‘light bulb’ moment for me because it was him to a T.
The truth is, there was always someone else, somewhere.
Sad actually.
I feel sorry for him.
I think the key is to weigh up the happy times to the sad times, if there are more happy ones, then perhaps there is hope.
Now that I understand how they think & behave, it makes it so much easier to break the chain.
Sorry my love.
Also not sorry.
You caused me so much pain & anxiety.
Life’s too short.

By: joanne walker

joanne walker — Mon, 02 Mar 2020 23:17:47 +0000

In reply to Page Pike. Psychologists are quite often narcs , I had therapy with a narc who was trying to change my ideology to that of narcism only to confuse a different higher qualified therapist later , who couldn’t figure me out and said one day why do you believe this , I said I don’t but I learnt this in therapy , I have trouble because my gut tells me otherwise and I can be conflicted , he said you know what your fine , trust your gut , and explained he was a narc himself and of course a narc would qualify himself to support his own behaviours ... but narcs deserve each other and will be a heaven and hell we won’t ever to experience the extremes they are going too ,

By: Maegen

Maegen — Tue, 18 Feb 2020 13:29:08 +0000

In reply to Page Pike. I love my narcissist so much. I am a nurse amd a true empath why is there not more research in how to help these people? I am by far an intelligent woman and have yet to find a way to help my narcissist. I hate to walk away. I feel I had a break through with him as he waited for me to leave the room and began to weep like a baby. Could someone please tell me how their entire makeup is this hideous? Him and I were long distance friends before anything and I find it most difficult to give up on him. He displays each and every one of these traits. I call him out all the time. I asked him what should I do and his reply was please just leave I dont want to destroy you. He says he knows the things I tell him about being a narcissist are true. I tell him it's not his fault that all of this was pre determined and he didnt choose the option of being a narcissist.

By: Jill

Jill — Sun, 06 Oct 2019 22:30:36 +0000

Life sometimes leads us down strange journeys! 12 years of a toxic relationship led to a painful discard. Of course there was someone else waiting in the wings. He is a master of half truths and manipulation. I survived and have gone no contact almost 2 years ago. Recently a friend mentioned his story that it was him that went no contact. I have to be thankful for the opportunity for a better life with a mentally healthy partner!

By: Kristen Milstead

Kristen Milstead — Sat, 05 Oct 2019 20:24:56 +0000

In reply to Page Pike. Degrees and education do not protect you from being manipulated. I had the bias too of believing that too once.

By: Page Pike

Page Pike — Sat, 05 Oct 2019 20:20:09 +0000

Kristen:

It’s been 8 years since my husband of 29 years ghosted me out of the blue with no precursors that anything was wrong. It was textbook ghosting.

That said, one thing that I still find intriguing is that my ex left me for a PhD psychologist—of all things! She was his old GF from HS. She dumped him back in the day when she witnessed his fits of rage. At least this is the story his entire family told for decades.

A number of years into our marriage (when we were applying for a VA mortgage), I happened across his DD-214 from the military. He was ‘asked to exit’ his enlistment (quote) ‘for the good of The Corps after he was given a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder with AntiSocial manifestations. When I asked him about it, he laughed it off as simply being a barracks prank that he pulled (roughing up another recruit) to get out of the military with full benefits after receiving his vocational training.

What I can’t figure out is why a 9supposedly intelligent and educated) woman with an active license as a psychologist—and who witnessed his raging behavior and therefore broke her engagement with him—would now run off with/subsequently marry such a man.

After a few moments of scratching my head every now and then over what appears to be something so counterintuitive, I usually end up shrugging my shoulders and chuckling at the possibility that it may actually her who is playing HIM in that relationship. But then, I have to admit that his love-bombing was Oscar-worthy. Maybe she’s just an amply-degreed fool as well. LOL

Life sure can be interesting.