Thank you so much! I genuinely appreciate the well wishes. I am honored to know that my words have been helpful to you in your own recovery. Stay strong! -Kristen

I’ve just read your article on some of the many effects of PTSD and reread the section you wrote about your frustrations in regard to your use and retrieval of YOUR language competencies. I write ‘your’ in capitals as it is, I believe the key to further examining and explaining why this occurs – to many with PTSD effects caused through narcissistic abuse.

Within such a relationship (- the term is almost an oxymoron as it’s more a controlled entrapment), the person being abused, generally ‘loses their voice’ both externally when trying to communicate to their abuser and internally when trying to analyse, explain, rationalize the bizarre behavior and verbal onslaughts to themselves.
I believe that over a period of time, our ability to use language, becomes conditioned to be silent so as to protect ourselves – and in so doing helps to create that ‘fog’ of cognitive dissonance as we continue to try and deny and/or rationalize why the abuser is abusing us. As you stated, the fog for you now, is not as bad – because you finally saw the reality of the abuse for what it was. It is since then that YOUR voice has begun its healing process and is flooding you with avenues to use it – both in written and verbal communications aimed at helping others. (thank goodness!!)

Focused meditation – taking a quiet time to practice saying something aloud that you want to say later to others, helps a great deal – almost like social inoculation – your practice prepares you emotionally and mentally.

The best healing through, comes through laughing again – by watching a comedy show, sharing or listening to jokes or listening to a podcast or TEDtalk that you know is going to be amusing – this floods the brain with endorphins and relaxes the muscles within the body – especially the throat which has over time been constricted by fear and stress through the period of abuse.
I hope this makes sense – I hope more that it may help others know THEIR voice will return with a renewed sense of purpose…and it will be not be so easily silenced again.